Miscellaneous Debris

Suggestions

2008-05-31T04:42:30Z

My response to fellow weirdo eamontoplease in his query to find new subjects worth elaborating on:

Write to enlighten. Write to educate.
I recommend noses.
Bring forth the often overlooked fact that they are the softest part of the body not considered an erogenous zone.
Personally, I like to poke at them and chew on them with my molars like they were a piece of beef jerky. I thump them with great vigor and rub them ever so gently when they are cold, because cold noses do a great impression of wet noses and, as everyone knows (nose), all parts of the body are better wet.
Animal noses are cool, too, because they are always wet. I rub them on my forehead and then stick them in my eye. It's more a compulsion than a fetish, but call them what you will; they're still chewable like Flinstones Vitamins.
But don't discuss the insides, because that's just gross.

Void

2007-12-02T06:38:10Z

I was doing so good for so long. It seemed as though I always had some humorous, abstract thing to share with the world. But I guess that I have finally used up the 168 jokes that I have acquired over the last 33 years.
And regardless of the lack of ideas ideas, there isn't an audience anyway. People have moved on to the real life for their comments and friendships (finally!). Few are still stuck in the world of lies we refer to as the internet. No one reads this inane stuff anyway. And if you doubt it, you will surely be able to tell by the lack of comments left to this mindless drivel.
I could talk of the horizontally procreating squirrels again. Or perhaps the jealousy of Neil Diamond. Maybe even the unoriginal scent of hemorrhoid pads. But regardless, the words will fall upon the deaf ears of friends no longer available. Names stamped upon bio pages of a biography long since left behind.
And I'm not sad. I'm glad for each and every person that was awakened to the fact that real life surpasses anything that can be puked upon the wet-eared reader. Pleased that communication is done with the tone of voice and intensity of the eye's stare as opposed to capitalization and unreadable fonts.
The world has moved on. Ka is a wheel, and it is forever in motion, and I could not be more pleased that each turn picks up pieces of lives and brings them to another part of the timeline and once again introduces them to life. The real one away from the lightbulb we call a monitor.
So I'd like to thank everyone in advance for not reading, and say that I appreciate everyone that couldn't comment due to having life in their path.
I wouldn't have it any other way.

The past a myth...

2007-10-15T04:45:03Z

I have picture phone proof...the generations before me didn't know shit from shampoo...
The end of the rainbow wasn't a pot of gold. It was a freakin' Hyundai!
I should have known better...

Whatever...

Belated observations

2007-08-22T03:00:19Z

Lately I have been lazy and inattentive to the audience that I am sure has left me for the most recent ethnic crazy on Comedy Central™. And forget the fact that I'm a Quarter Rican myself.
I'm a snob.
But even this snob can share those things that put extra wrinkles on my dick and extra shots of Southern Comfort in my glass.
- Stain and water-resistant pants aren't all that after all. Instead of the extra drops of urine soaking into your crotch, they shoot straight down the inside of the pants from your crotch all the way to the socks. People standing outside the men's bathroom don't know if I have a urine problem or crab infestation as I rub myself down from thigh to toe.
- Fast-food restaurants still don't have a clue. I just wanna be a regular fat American citizen and place my order. "Excuse me. EXCUSE ME! Yes. Thank you, minimum wages worker. I'll take a block of cheddar cheese. Sharp. To go. Minus the burger. Oh yeah, and a diet coke. To go. No! I SAID 'TO GO!' No, it's okay. Thanks."
- Don't ever stop shaving your balls. All you get is a freaky looking case of acne that reduces advertisement to the unwary.
- If taking shots of alcohol while watching Intervention doesn't give you guilt, you probably need to switch places with the BJ-giving bimbo on TV.
- Vodka is better when shared with a liver.
- Don't let the talk fool you. Just because your mommy says you're beautiful, it doesn't mean that you don't look like twice-healed canker sore.
- If you meet a girl that can fart and have it call out your name, you probably shouldn't consider anal sex, because it would simply be really weird oral sex with a small mouth and no teeth.
I'm sure there is more, but if I shared them now, then I wouldn't post again until November 17th, 2009. And my one remaining fan might give up and turn towards Kathy Griffin.
God forbid...

I'll do what I damn well please

2007-03-01T01:48:12Z

I have recently been taking pride in my celibacy. Other than two kisses (both against my will) and one party foul of the penetration kind, I've been totally un-sluttish for almost a full 6 months. And while I was proud of myself for a while, all I have really learned is that no matter how hard I will it, my right hand won't lubricate itself, and I still don't have a better image than I once did. And here is where reality steps in.
There have been a couple of near-misses in the relationship field, some amazingly close. I still talk myself out of them, and allow other people into talking themselves out of it as well. But my life outside that 2 person entanglement doesn't really play a role in how that union turns out. So I have decided not to waste valuable time I'll soon take for granted. Whether I choose to be celibate or not fate will determine what my future holds, regardless of what I might or might not desire, so I'll do damned well what I please in the meantime.
I originally took upon this arduous task of celibacy because I finally got my self-esteem in check. And it's still totally there. I do just fine for myself, and I have no worries that all those things I want will fall into place with no effort on my part. But just because I have confidence in myself doesn't mean that I should turn down the freebees, because not only do I believe in myself, I also believe in the healing powers of the vagina, and am often reminded about how much warmer it's handshake is better than that of my own.
So starting next week, I'll be out and about doing all the things I can't talk about at work. I've already gotten the hair done and the eyebrows waxed. All is in place, and now I'm ready to take life by the vulva.

Nice to meet you

2007-01-30T03:50:23Z

Here lately I feel as though I'm totally losing myself. I've split into two pieces and been divided again unto myself. I see myself through a third-person view and I have no idea what Rob's doing anymore. It's not that I don't have things under control. But now I just kind of float through like heavy smoke. I'm leaving a stain as I fade away. I just want to be introduced to myself again. Shake my hand and say, "It's cool to finally meet you".
Because so far, I'm nothing more than rumor.

Just found it

2006-12-13T04:19:22Z

I was cleaning out the ol' MS Outlook and ran across more poetry that I barely remember writing. The thing I always liked about finding stuff you don't recall creating is that you have more of an unbiased opinion, because it is like seeing it for the first time. It's like it wasn't even yours to begin with. And it promotes honesty.

I slept my day away
Images of drug dealing delinquencies and simple intelligence
Building the chip on my shoulder
I need new familiarity
and comfortable unconformity.
Invade my space with spoken words of unfamiliarity and wonder
that Melanie will not heed.
Indeed.
No one listens.
I fled, journeyed away from drunken reality that wasn't my own
I escaped nothing.
Elephants serenade me
light, brightened light that show the lack of reason for fear.
And I slept under poetry of bungled spice and witticism.
And it was good.

Absent

2006-10-24T02:39:59Z

I had a friend e-mail me today reminding me how absent I have been on LJ lately. I told her about how I only post those things that other people might find interesting.
I normally don't talk about what I wore to work, or what I ate for lunch. I typically only test out my creative writings on you people, looking for the honest compliment, or even the "You gotta publish this shit" statement to coax my ego.
I had stuff planned to write for today, but now that the day is done, I feel more inspired to use this blog what it was truly intended for.
It's a journal to talk about my thoughts, my desires, and to release those things I feel that are in danger of making me explode if I don't voluntarily let them out on my own.
My best friend's father passed away this evening.
I knew him before he got sick.
I remember when he told his son and me how much of a cocksucker we both were. I remember when he proclaimed that we were both a couple of pussies.
I remember how he told us like it was out of love, trust, and the understanding that life is about the smiles you get out of putting your elbow in someone's funnybone to ensure the full attention that each of us deserves.
Pops made me happy. Pops made a definite impression.
And life is just a bit more empty now he's not here to remind me how I'm really a pussy after all.
Because he was totally right. Live it to the max today, because tomorrow you might not get to.
I actually had tears find their way to my cheeks. Not only because I loved Pops as family, but because it reminded me I'll be in my friend's shoes soon enough.
My true friends know my Mom's quite sick and has been for a while. Time is almost up. The earth will have it's moment of silence when it comes, way sooner that I would like.
But this isn't about me. It's about my best friend, and the way we both referred to him as though he were the father of the both of us: Pops.
I love you, you cocksucker.
And always will.

Sorry NY Babe, this wasn't the post you asked for.
But it's the truth.

Funny stories next post...

Nothing interesting

2006-10-03T04:30:51Z

This is totally not me, but I no longer feel safe sharing all the parts of my interesting life. I almost feel like some things are sacred. I guess being something of a public whore makes one more critical of sharing one's conquests, especially since the other people that helped to make me a whore tend to view this site.
It was easy when I was devoted to one person, but here lately, the world is mine. I actually turn down more than I accept. And I still get waaayyy more than my share.
Life is weird.
Tonight I went out for some drinks, met other friends, and had a killer time. And for once, didn't go home with a woman.
That's the first time in like...2 days.
And I totally contribute it to me not trying, not to me not being able to. Because here lately, if there is a possibility, I make it happen. I don't know where Super Mack Rob has been for the last 32 years, but he has definately been making an appearance lately. And it's honestly nice to know where I stand, who I can get, and, most importantly, what I deserve.
For right now, I just don't know what I want more...to continue to get free booty, to take the playa role to keep girls chasing me without the follow-through, or to settle down with someone that actually really cares about me and a girl that I totally feel the same way about.
It's tough, but all I know is that I haven't met the one that really puts the rest of the world on hold (although there have been 2 girls that made me think, and a third that I don't know how to get a hold of), so until then, ladies...
...I'm still your whore...

Breaking Tradition

2006-09-23T03:58:40Z

My decision...
No Halloween party.
The last party I was at was a total mess. Breaking up fights. Getting into fights. Getting thrown up on. Thieves. Moochers. Drama. Effort. Money.
Forget all that.
You all can have it. I can go out, have just as much fun elsewhere and then not worry about cleaning up before and after.
I used to want to throw the party because I would get to be the top guy for a night. But I've learned that it doesn't take a party to be that guy. I'm pretty much always the man.
And that's that.

Far too late

2006-09-13T06:30:47Z

I'm still the man. Nice to know I still got it.
It's late, I'm drunk, and I gotta get up in 3 1/2 hours.
Tomorrow will suck, but I wouldn't take it back for all the Southern Comfort in the world.

And on another note, some friends of mine rented out the VIP suite in the place next door to Campeche Bay in Jax Beach for a multiple birthday party this Saturday. Full bar, pool table, kegs, and tons of people. Good times are ahead. Interested? Comment, and I'll get you info.

And on the last note of the night...
85% chance that I won't have the Halloween party. Details to follow...

I barely keep up

2006-08-26T01:43:19Z

The last few weeks have been nuts. Both my inbox and my cell phone have been getting blown up. I've been offered everything from vagina to free concert tickets. It's nice to know I still got it. But specifically, what's been going on with Rob?
Musically:
I jammed with an ol' school friend in the studio, motivated the hell out of me. So now I practice a good 2 hours a day on the drums. Broke 3 drum sticks in a 4-day period. I rock.
Wrote another new song. One of the few I'm actually proud of. I plan on recording a final copy over the weekend. I anticipate that in the next 2 months, I'll have about 8 songs to record for my own album. There's plenty more, just not enough worthy of public attention.
I also quit my job @ Tijuana Flats. In about 2 weeks, I'll apply at the two Harmonious Monks in Jax for a job. I'm excited, but just wanna catch my breath before I tie up all my free time again.
Socially:
I'm about to have to get a new cell plan, people call me so often, my minutes are going to go over. But I tolerate it because it's usually women. It's great to be reminded of how much you game you really have. I now make it a habit to carry protection. I seem to get molested a lot.
Work:
Fuck work! I HATE those bastards!! The only thing I have to look forward to is meeting w/Beka for lunch Monday. I love non-fat chicks.
The present:
You nosey bastards! I'm going to drink with a shitload of lonely women in about 20 minutes. And that's all I'm saying.
If you wanna hear the rest, then you better check out Penthouse Forum in the near future.
=)

Type to you later, you shy bastards.

Apologies

2006-08-07T02:46:30Z

Dear fans -

Please forgive me for the lack of entertainment I have provided as of late. I used to be able to conjure up stories of Neil Diamond, masturabatory misadventures, poetic poetry and the like.
However for the last several months I've been quite sober and happy.
It's really hard to be deep and abstract when things are going appropriately right.
I never knew creativity was the ejaculate of Southern Comfort.

- Rob

Packing again

2006-07-14T21:14:25Z

I'm getting awfully tired. I've done sooo much traveling that it's making me dizzy. I'm in need of a break.
Since last October, I've been to:

- Las Vegas
- West Virginia for some Snowboarding
- Atlanta
- Ohio
- Tampa
- Ginnie Springs (Lake City/Gainesville)...twice
- Tallahasse
- Camping near the Jetties
- Palatka

Now I'm packing to leave for Georgia again for the weekend. I love adventure. I love staying busy. I like having these cool things to do with such killer people. I'm just sooo worn out. And I'll probably be leaving again in about 3 weeks for another extended weekend to Tampa, and camping at my cabin in Keystone Heights 2 weeks after that.
At least all this traveling is keeping me fit.
The six-pack is showing with minimal exercise.
So I guess I shouldn't complain.

Oh yeah...here's your 3 months' notice...Halloween party once again coming up in October.
And I get to stay home!

A Lack of Censorship

2006-06-30T03:52:46Z

My posts of late have been lackluster, to say the least.
So I masturbated over some whippits and my trusty Pizza Hut shirt.
Life is good.

You brought me closer to God

2006-06-19T03:21:11Z

We all need a good, soulful sermon every now and then.

Don't forget to come back for the evening service.

Un-freakin-believable!

2006-06-12T01:10:35Z

I picked up my car from the body shop yesterday. All is well. And in less than 24 hours, some thieving asshole took it upon himself to break into my car and gank my stereo.

At least he was nice enough to take out the cd that was in the player before he sold it for a 6-pack of Nat Light and a pack of smokes.

Update

2006-06-06T00:46:14Z

Here is a quick update to my last post

I love public records

Finally...something worth reporting

2006-06-04T14:59:53Z

Everyone over the age of 5 should know their alphabet, regardless whether you are illiterate or dyslexic.

Shannon McCarthy, age 27, is the exception.

Last I checked, the letter "V" does not come before "J". Nor is "Z" not the last letter in the alphabet.

However, that is how she recited it to the officer that was administering her the field sobriety test after rearending me last night.

My car held up remarkably well. Hers? Totaled. That almost makes me feel better.

The airbags deployed and the car was filled with smoke and when I saw how bad the damage was I went into superhero mode yanking drunk people out of the car like a clepto with Twix bars. The one passenger shrunk down and started screaming, "Don't hit me!" and for the first time ever, I wasn't actually filled with road rage, just concern. But it did kinda tickle me that he thought I was going to start swinging at him for hitting me.

I'm debating going to the ER...nice, irregular lump and bruise on my right forearm, but there was nothing that I could have bumped into. Can't tell if I fractured it, or it's just a bundling of the muscle. I'm only nervous because the pain isn't normal, and what else could it be seeing as how I didn't hit it on anything. It was the only arm holding the steering wheel, and I sit way back so my arm was straight at the time of the impact. So I dunno, if it doesn't get better by midafternoon, I'll drive down there.

Happy Sunday to me.

Too early!!

2006-05-11T08:48:43Z

I'm in the airport. It is 4:47 am. I'm hungry and there is no Southern Comfort to be found.
Breakfast can't come early enough.

Holy Crap!!

2006-05-06T23:02:28Z

Work is getting really weird.

Someone took a shit on the floor.

Two pieces of mookie sticks were found lying abandoned by work desks out in the great wide open. A good 30 desks from the bathroom.
How in the hell does that happen?
I kinda hope the culprit becomes a repeat offender. Someone could potentially start collecting some serious punk rock points.

Pursuit

2006-04-27T02:01:39Z

So I got a new job. New job meaning additional job.

I now play guitar and sing at a local established restaurant chain. Free beer and tips. Rock on.
I'll occasionally play at one location for one night, then play at the other the next. And I'm already scheduled to be the main attraction for Cinco De Mayo.

Last Friday I had my little audition. I was somewhere between "suck" and "not too bad". I sat and watched the regular guy for a while before I played, and then I went up to play on his equipment and tried to play like him. His style, his songs, his genre, etc. But that was wrong. I should have played like me. I have 20 years of experience and personal style, I need to use it.

So I did my practicing, my next night will be with my own equipment, and I totally plan to tear the house down.

I've been wanting to do this my whole life, and now that I have a morning job (my first in 15 years), I can finally afford to waste a few nights of my free time showing off and drinking for free.

And no, I didn't forget to name the place of my employment. I want a few weeks of playing under my belt before I invite too many of my friends to make sure I'm at the top of my game when they see me.

Sorry for the lack of humor and drama in this post. Just being real.

For what it's worth

2006-03-26T02:15:49Z

This is one post that I really hope people will read. It would mean a lot to me, even if you all don't respond.

Someone made the comment recently that I never do real posts about me with real substance. It's always bathroom humor, and never anything real. Most of that came up because I am on MySpace, but I only post entries there that I have done previously here on LJ that get the most compliments and the biggest laughs, and all the ones I posted there are flat out raunchy. So it would seem that yes, I only do toilet humor.
I post material like that because they are usually more entertaining than the typical drivel most people post. The copious amount of comments and compliments I get stand alone as a testament as to why I constantly write material like that. People tell me they spend their work days reading old entries and laughing for hours. It's really uplifting to have people admire your work so much. I feel like a celebrity. Most people never get that kind of flattery.
You see, I only care to read real journals from real friends I know and love. And I incorrectly assume everyone thinks like I do and that no one will read mine if they aren't funny.

But all of this did cause me to think and go back over my own entries.

Of the last 25 entries, only 4 of them were actually bathroom humor, aside from two picture/video posts.
So the statement was slightly inaccurate about me being unable to write something normal and clean. I have gotten away from that. More so every day. I have actually started talking about regular things, like everyone else. However, when I do talk about those things, they are never really things that dwell deep within me. What I care about. Where it hurts. What moves me. What makes me cry.

So with that in mind...a long, long post of truth...

I am so fortunate to have the best group of friends imaginable. I love them all so much.
But I'm losing my best friend of all, and it's tearing me apart.

I'm in love. Took time to realize it, longer to admit it, and far too long to do anything about it.
And now I'm watching it slip away, helplessly. I'm losing my love, I'm losing my mind. My future. She's absolutely everything to me.
I met her when she was young, and I never took it seriously, but I have watched her mature into the very woman I want to have my life revolve around until I have no more life to offer to this world directly, only through the kids I'd want to have raised with her.
To me, she's amazing to look at. I'd stay awake all night just to watch her sleep. And I have.
I actually find my way to finally shut my mouth just so I can here the sweet sounds escaping her lips.

And here's how I lost it.
I constantly wanted to hold out for something better. I blamed the age gap. I blamed her. I never told her I loved her. I never introduced her to anyone as anything at all. I never held her. I constantly tried to overshadow her. I never supported her because her success made me more aware of my own inadequacy. I took my own assorted problems out on her. I drank enough to drown her. I ruined her....no...I ruined myself.

And she finally had enough. And no one, myself included, can blame her.
Now we still talk, almost daily. We still get together. She is normally distant and cold, protecting herself from the harsh environment I could produce. But when she lets her guard down, the world once again revolves, the grey skies turn blue, the sun smiles upon us, and I soak up the happiness.
I know for a fact she does too. She often is the instigator of the get-togethers in which we get to do and act how we should have acted long ago. But her thoughts always return to the bad times, and the heartache of regression, and she again closes up, becomes abrupt, and even rude. She's in such a state of irritation that everything that I say or do that she used to love about me rubs her wrong. She's constantly stressed and sick, no doubt mostly caused by all this. Because she's scared. Confused. Hurt. She screams, "Why didn't you do this back then when it mattered?" But that's really why she gets cold and mean. To protect herself. She wants to come back, sometimes really bad, and when she starts to allow it to happen, she has to be mean, to pick fights, to close up in order to keep us apart. To keep herself safe.
She's since started her own new life, accomplishing her goals, and it's scary to risk that. And she can't go through the hurt the risk takes out of her. Crushed dreams are the worst type of cancer imaginable. They debilitate, eat, and blacken the mind, heart, and soul. The body withers, the tears come more often than dinner. The pain will kill you just as fast. I am totally aware. As is she.

So, that's how she deals. But what about me?
I only have had one other relationship besides her. And when the first girl left, I was hurt, but as soon as I met up with another girl, I was not just fine, I was born again. I was alive, ready to take chances, optimistic of the future. But with my current situation, it's totally the opposite. We broke up once before, and I had space, freedom, and I took advantage of it. I had the pleasure of rediscovering my popularity, and had several very wonderful opportunities with other deserving women. But I couldn't offer anything. Unlike the previous girl and breakup, I wasn't alive. I was dead. I had those opportunities to be intimate, but I froze and found ways out. My thoughts were totally on my love. Irreplaceable, undying love. I wasn't feeling more alive. I was dying inside with the thought of anything with anyone besides her.
And that spoke volumes to me. If I had those opportunities, some of which looked like much better deals, but I still only wanting that one thing, well, I think that's what real devotion is. You can love more than one person, but you can only be devoted to one. And that's what truly makes a real relationship. Not the love, but the devotion. I tried to get her back, and I did, but at the worst possible of times. And I ruined it. There are sorry excuses, and a few legitimate reasons for the failure, but it doesn't change the fact that it happened.

We broke up again.

But this time I can't get that second chance to prove I know how to fix it all.
And my reaction is no different this time. I've gone out plenty lately. My phone rings off the hook. People show up at my door. Again, I spend hours upon hours with other women to make myself feel better, optimistic, and alive. And again, it's the same story. I'll look at another girl, but squint my eyes so that I can pretend it's her. I hear a laugh, and try to believe the sound was made by her. It's not fair to the other people, but I can't help where my heart and mind takes me.
If I knew the magic words, the perfect gift, the ultimate proof, I would not procrastinate in taking advantage of whatever it was that could save my future and my place in her heart. And lately, she's moving further away. Pushing towards her pushes her away. It's the emotional version of the law Newton introduced to us so long ego. "For every action, there is an equal and opposite reaction." And I can't handle it.

I think about some of the worst problems in her life when I held her and let her cry herself to sleep. And now I need the same in his darkest hour of misery, and it isn't there. I have to take the pain alone. I remember times of ultimate joy, intellectual conversations, unguarded life. And to think I'm not going to share those moments with her again ...man, I just can't even find the right words to convey that loss.

So what have I done about it? How can I prove that not only have I uncovered the roots of the problems, but have also put plans into action with results?
First thing was the drinking. I've said it in previous posts, but I've been more sober in the last 6 months than I have been in nearly 15 years. That's huge. I know the right things to say, the right actions to take, but if I do them too much, it has a negative adverse affect, but it doesn't mean that my mind doesn't know what to say, when to say it, and how to express it. But she asked me to stop. It's been almost 5 full months, and I'm still just as in love as I was the first day. I've since long given up thinking I'll get that opportunity to try again, but that doesn't mean that I don't know what I want, need, and pray for.
I started reevaluating my own goals, lifestyle, decisions, and future. Because although she's so much younger than me, she has already accomplished so much more. She's much stronger than me, and is forcing me to grow as well. And I love her for that. She motivates me, inspires me, pushes me to be more. Which is what love, and only love can do.
All I want is the opportunity to start from the beginning, like we first met, and slowly build that relationship. Last time in was in dire straights, we separated, and jumped in with wayyy too much to conquer at once. You can't go from zero emotion and separate lives to full emotion, moving in together, new jobs, and expect everything to clear up at once. We needed time to heal, time to work our way up to where we belong. What I'd ask for would be for her to keep her separate residence, separate belongings, separate schedule, everything. And us to start the right way. Actually date, slowly move forward and plan separately to plan together. Where the risk isn't so great and the basis for a strong foundation is almost inevitable.
And although I know all of this and know it's not beyond the realm of reality, none of it is up to me.
So all I can do is dream.

Terrible fucking day

2006-03-15T00:33:35Z

I got up and drove my ass to Tallahassee in the pouring rain.
Alone, because I reserved a room overnight to attend day two where I'd meet with the political bigwigs of the State of Florida. You know, the Florida Senate, the House of Representatives, the Governor, etc... Most people went for just day one, so they got company cars, rode together and got cool projects to do, so I was left alone all day. So I go to get my info for day two..and get this....there IS no day two for Jacksonville residents.
After speaking to public relations, it all boils down to this:
We bought our opinion.
The point of day two is to get in groups and meet with the legislative group to show our support on issues that affect our job and Florida residents. But because Jacksonville is so far away, State Farm decided to open the checkbook and pay out funds for support as opposed to showing up personally. No one told me, because that's not the type of thing people like us are supposed to know about. So it's better to have me show up and inconvenience myself and my checkbook, and then go home on some lame excuse, all the while holding onto my ignorance. I only found out the true story because I have known the main public affairs lately for the last 8 years and have done plenty of favors for her in the past, and she felt bad that they fucked me over to save their reputable reputation.
Hence why I hate politics.
So now, I'm left with a cancellation fee for the room I couldn't use, and nothing to do but drive home.

So I was bored and decided to see where the governor (Irony) kicks on in my Saturn Vue.
The answer is 101 mph.
And how much does it cost for this info?
$208.50.
At least that's what the Trooper charged me for taking this picture. I'm going to go to court so I don't acquire any points. Unfortunately, it's in MacClenny.
And to top it off, I broke my last media card for my camera trying to take a picture of my citation for this post. Un-fucking-believable!
I'm inclined to ask if this day can get any worse, but I know that it can, and fate will prove it to me, so instead I'll just shut the fuck up.

Accomplished and hurting

2006-03-14T02:52:30Z

I'm finally getting things done. That's kinda rare lately. In the last 48 hour period, I have:
- I grew a beard.
- Got a haircut - ironic, seeing the first accomplishment
- Cleaned the office and set up a nice rigging for my ironing board. I'm fucking Molly Maid.
- Put in all the required overtime for the month in one weekend. Thank you, darvacet.
- Detailed my car inside and out. You can't even tell that I've driven nekkid in it anymore.
- Put up my generic carport and actually buried the base in the ground so it wouldn't be inclined to fall on my car and fuck it up a second time.
- Mowed my grass (I gotta big yard).
- Raked some of my yard (I gotta big yard).
- Wrote a song after being inspired. Been working on material with another guy, and soon it will be brought to the public. Finally. Chicks will be so hot that they will stick to the seat like a suction cup. Man, that's hot.
- Listened to some already recorded songs/tracks to prepare for tweaking and newer, better versions. Hopefully.
- Spent time in a jacuzzi and didn't make it home for the night. Too bad it was only because I was tired as shit, and not getting it on with people of the opposite gender. But the wine was good.
- Cooked dinner and made lunches for future meals. Call me a bitch, I don't care.
- Did laundry. I'm really starting to enjoy my feminine side.
- Packed for my trip to Tallahassee. I'm gonna hate this. It's to meet with politicians, and I fucking hate politics
- Bought and installed a new hard drive. I'm very happy to have new porn.
- Organized and cleaned up about 80 gigs of material on my system. My computer is quite pleased.
- Preparing for my trip to Atlanta next week (ie: washing out my old flask). Good times are ahead.
- Sold and mailed off my eBay items. Mo' money, mo' money, mo' money!!

So what's the hurting all about?
Only the worst case of heartburn ever!
I mean, I seriously feel it in my neck, throat, jaw, leg, arm, and chest. Incredible. How does that happen? That's like the 3rd time this month. It's awful. I can barely swallow any more of my beer. But I'm managing. I'm determined.
Okay, enough yapping about all that which is uninteresting.